kids

wow for quite some time i didn't update my blog. these days i kept updating my status and daily progress in my diary, so i didn't come here that often now. but however, today i'm here. time now is 9.36am, i'm in the office. suppose to do my works, instead of that i decided to leave few words here. moreover i don't have much works to do, so it doesn't really matter.

anyway, this morning i thought about kids. last time when i'm young, i don't quite remember whether i was in secondary school or college, i used to think that i don't like kids. they're annoying, making so much of noises, burdens and more. and i told my parents i'm not going to get any kid when i'd grown up. and my parents said i'll change my mind as soon as i've grown up, and they're right.

too embarrass to admit sometime my parents read my mind, they're like 'you goona bla bla bla ...' LOL. but never the less, these days i start changing my mind. not these days, since the beginning of this year, i start thinking about my future, and the 'kids' part was included. i am too good on visualizing something, if this would come out as 1 subject in school, i'm pretty sure that i'll score A+ in every exam.

yes, i want to look for my soul mate. i want to work at foreign country. i want to socialize with different people. i want to understand their living cultures. i want to help people to recover from sickness. i want to take part in all kind of 'Go Green' activities. i want to join SPCA or any NGO to save animals. i want to do charity run for orphans and old folks.

and i want to have at least a kid. i prefer two so the first one won't be alone. no matter what, i'm getting one. even one day i did not marry anyone, i'm still getting a kid. i want a family, and kid is a must. i will get through by adoption. if local adoption is hard, i'll go for international adoption.

i told my mother what's running in my mind, and she didn't say anything. she remain silent, and for that i'm not sure whether she's agree with what i've told her earlier. she doesn't want to interject my thoughts, she just wants me to go with my mind even though she doesn't agree in silence. and i appreciate that silence. thanks for being so thoughtful, all the time. i love you mom.

if i happen to have a kid. I'm going to teach him everything I've gone through. what's good what's bad, told him/her my experiences, spend my time with them, tell them bedtime stories, go for a vacation, teach them to be a better person, chat like friends giving advices and opinions.

look, there's a lot of seductions in this world. for that we really don't know what is correct and which is wrong. everything we have to go through ourself so we'll get lesson and mentally grow up, be matured. nothing in this world is easy, nothing in this world is free. for what you want, you have to work hard and give your best shot. not the moon, but at least among the stars. and for that, i want my kid to understand.

think logically. observe and think whether this or that goona work out. look for what you want to achieve in your life. to find an self-interested thing is the hardest goal in life. but if you found it, you know your next step. never leave regrets in your life, don't let it conquers your life. if that's what you want, even though the journey is going to be hard, full with obstacles, just keep on walking, don't quit. As long as that won't hurt them, that's fine with me, you'd get my blessing, sincerely.

Go for what you really want, live a splendid life.