on saturday, november 27 2010, i got one entry talking about my father. today's post will be my mother.
how should i begin the story..
this funeral made me thoroughly understand what humanity is. it makes me so damn f*king upset. there are so many different kinds of people with different kinds of thinking, one of the most unacceptable view actually existed in my maternal side of family.
the sadness has nothing to do with my grand pa's death, it's actually about the decedent's behavior which seriously i cannot accept it. firstly i thought it was my own problem, but when my father has the same feeling as me, i think, no, i feel lucky im not belong to their world.
I. DON'T. AGREE. THE. WAY. THEY. SOLVE. THE. MATTER.
and what's the f*king wrong with that guy who just came back from sg? U DID NOTHING! NOTHING!
at the introduction i talked about my mom. during the funeral i swear to God i din't even drop a tear. but the words spitted out from my mother, that made me very sad.
during the night i had a chat with my father, and i lost control for the 2nd time. nothing can make me drop a single tear except my family. we talked a lot about THOSE INCIDENTS that happened during the funeral, and now i realized that i'm actually has the same channel as him.
you know, throughout the years i don't really understand him. but after this, i know we have a very strong bond. indescribable powerful bond. and for my mom, i should have understand her pain on losing her father, and i'm wanna say: you'll need some time, papa, sis and I are fine.
sad for only 2 days, and starts up your brand new third day. may God bless you sweetheart.
p/s: i'm not a person with good temper, i'll lost control with it once you hurt my family.
the procedure
on Tuesday, June 28, 2011
yesterday i slept for only 2 hours and forced to go to school again. i went back to home yesterday around 3am something, and i have to wake up at 5.30am, i will die soon -.- however, luckily i went to school or else i'll miss a lot of lessons.
and after i reached home and done everything, i went to grand ma house to attend my grand pa funeral. the procedures were long, and to be frank, so boring. i shouldn't be said in that way, but it's what i feel. anyway everybody look calm today and accepted the fact. at the same time, got a lot of people came to pay the last respect and say good bye to grand pa too :)
i need sleep badly, good night folks
and after i reached home and done everything, i went to grand ma house to attend my grand pa funeral. the procedures were long, and to be frank, so boring. i shouldn't be said in that way, but it's what i feel. anyway everybody look calm today and accepted the fact. at the same time, got a lot of people came to pay the last respect and say good bye to grand pa too :)
i need sleep badly, good night folks
thankyou, my grand pa
on Monday, June 27, 2011
24 hours a day, isn't long and isn't short. today, my 24 hours seem not moving, it froze.
i don't know what to say, the previous day he's still alright, eating drinking sleeping and walking, but today in the morning, everything changed.
he passed away. yes my grand pa, he passed away. last time i've been talking about my grand pa had been admitted into hospital for an operation. weeks after the operation he's still alright, but until today, every single thing changed all a sudden, seriously just in a blink of eye.
everybody cried, but i din't even drop one tear, my tear gland get stuck i guess, it just doesn't want to come out. but when i'm in the hospital, after pay a visit to him at red zone, i was on my way to take my car and on that time without any people around me, i can feel my warm tear circulate in my eye.
he passed away at his own house, his home. when i look at his face, he was peaceful, the pain he endured for quite some time until my cousin came back from sg had finally end, which we should glad for him. i got some flashbacks in my mind, pictures among us came out one by one.
his rough hand, his big tummy, unforgettable. 10 years back, i sat behind him on a motor, we're on the way to take our breakfast. my hand wrap around his big tummy, pair of my hand was unreachable. he holds my hand into the restaurant, the warmness and roughness was so protective.
that's the only thing i can remember. i tried to dig those memories up but it's all so blur, blur, very blur. anyway, for all my way to teenager since baby, thank you so much for.. everything. despite i cannot remember, but thanks that you had spent your time with me, at least, when i'm young.
sincerely, thank you so much, for everything.
p/s: 这些年来，辛苦你了。
i don't know what to say, the previous day he's still alright, eating drinking sleeping and walking, but today in the morning, everything changed.
he passed away. yes my grand pa, he passed away. last time i've been talking about my grand pa had been admitted into hospital for an operation. weeks after the operation he's still alright, but until today, every single thing changed all a sudden, seriously just in a blink of eye.
everybody cried, but i din't even drop one tear, my tear gland get stuck i guess, it just doesn't want to come out. but when i'm in the hospital, after pay a visit to him at red zone, i was on my way to take my car and on that time without any people around me, i can feel my warm tear circulate in my eye.
he passed away at his own house, his home. when i look at his face, he was peaceful, the pain he endured for quite some time until my cousin came back from sg had finally end, which we should glad for him. i got some flashbacks in my mind, pictures among us came out one by one.
his rough hand, his big tummy, unforgettable. 10 years back, i sat behind him on a motor, we're on the way to take our breakfast. my hand wrap around his big tummy, pair of my hand was unreachable. he holds my hand into the restaurant, the warmness and roughness was so protective.
that's the only thing i can remember. i tried to dig those memories up but it's all so blur, blur, very blur. anyway, for all my way to teenager since baby, thank you so much for.. everything. despite i cannot remember, but thanks that you had spent your time with me, at least, when i'm young.
sincerely, thank you so much, for everything.
p/s: 这些年来，辛苦你了。
about today- Friday?
on Saturday, June 25, 2011
i borrowed a book from library again! well, Angel and Demon, this book attracts me a lot, in progress :D of course, by Dan Brown.
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and today during GP class, we watched a movie: My Name is Khan. we cannot finish the whole movie, so it will carry onwards on Monday. this movie is f*king meaningful! it inspired me despite i haven't finish the whole movie.
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put it on your MUST-WATCH list.
during the night, i watched The Batman Begins that Priya downloaded it for me. that movie was super clear, HD in size of 2GB can you believe it!? thanks dude! and the main character starring the movie was Christian Bale. and recenly i knew that he had been throwing F bombs on public, hmm, maybe last year?
well, i din't mean anything. but actors are humans, they have feeling and emotion, should we be a little considerate huh? i think he endured for quite some time before he throws all the F bombs. =/
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p/s: next, American Psycho and The Dark Knight.
and today during GP class, we watched a movie: My Name is Khan. we cannot finish the whole movie, so it will carry onwards on Monday. this movie is f*king meaningful! it inspired me despite i haven't finish the whole movie.
put it on your MUST-WATCH list.
during the night, i watched The Batman Begins that Priya downloaded it for me. that movie was super clear, HD in size of 2GB can you believe it!? thanks dude! and the main character starring the movie was Christian Bale. and recenly i knew that he had been throwing F bombs on public, hmm, maybe last year?
well, i din't mean anything. but actors are humans, they have feeling and emotion, should we be a little considerate huh? i think he endured for quite some time before he throws all the F bombs. =/
p/s: next, American Psycho and The Dark Knight.
4 in 1
on Wednesday, June 22, 2011
it's been.. hmm few days never update anything since my pc had a difficult time x)
so start from sunday.. happy father's day eventhough it's quite late for now haha, and just few minutes ago i pissed off because i don't know what happened to this blogger, it don't allowed me to upload a photo. never mind i will do it tomorrow.
monday, hmm everything is just normal. and i get a very appealing message which she was finally solved her friendship issues which had last for maybe.. a month? this issue can be so troublesome and finally she did it. :D
tuesday, went to swim after school with mr chen. what happened was there are people using the pool for swimming lesson, or should i say for co-curriculum. but still im able to swim for few laps. when i try out the ''butterfly'' my leg cramped. OUCH! SO PAINFUL! indescribable pain God!
and tuesday night, i went to mcD with my cousin and i left my mother's phone on the table! this freaked me out and luckily the staff in-charged lobby gave me back the phone. million thanks to him and, THANKS GOD at the same time -.- i'm so careless yesterday
for today, basically nothing happen, which is actually a good news. oh i remembered, Peggy came to canteen 1 to meet us. so long din't see her and we all found out that she became so much happier than in A-level. all the best to her, and, WE ALL MISS YOU A LOT xD
p/s: 4 in 1 without any picture was quite boring. i can feel it myself =.=
so start from sunday.. happy father's day eventhough it's quite late for now haha, and just few minutes ago i pissed off because i don't know what happened to this blogger, it don't allowed me to upload a photo. never mind i will do it tomorrow.
monday, hmm everything is just normal. and i get a very appealing message which she was finally solved her friendship issues which had last for maybe.. a month? this issue can be so troublesome and finally she did it. :D
tuesday, went to swim after school with mr chen. what happened was there are people using the pool for swimming lesson, or should i say for co-curriculum. but still im able to swim for few laps. when i try out the ''butterfly'' my leg cramped. OUCH! SO PAINFUL! indescribable pain God!
and tuesday night, i went to mcD with my cousin and i left my mother's phone on the table! this freaked me out and luckily the staff in-charged lobby gave me back the phone. million thanks to him and, THANKS GOD at the same time -.- i'm so careless yesterday
for today, basically nothing happen, which is actually a good news. oh i remembered, Peggy came to canteen 1 to meet us. so long din't see her and we all found out that she became so much happier than in A-level. all the best to her, and, WE ALL MISS YOU A LOT xD
p/s: 4 in 1 without any picture was quite boring. i can feel it myself =.=
hair dye
on Saturday, June 18, 2011
it's just so crazy. well dye actually is a normal thing but red colour is a bit.. however, the product not really RED colour for me, but it did to mr chen wtf =.=
im so GOLDISH right now! with a little bit red colour. i named it red-brown to make myself much more comfortable lol.
between, we dye our hair today, after school, rush back to my place, go and buy hair dye, and start the process which is quite successfully at the end anyway :D
*thanks to my mother and sister <3
and then, after we finish up the hair dye, i immediately have to dress up myself for a choir music concert at Yean's U, which is UCSI. and the choir, is cool!
the only comment i can made is, human's voices can be such beautiful.
p/s: once in my life, at least i dye my hair RED-BROWN. =D
im so GOLDISH right now! with a little bit red colour. i named it red-brown to make myself much more comfortable lol.
between, we dye our hair today, after school, rush back to my place, go and buy hair dye, and start the process which is quite successfully at the end anyway :D
*thanks to my mother and sister <3
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| before |
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| after |
and then, after we finish up the hair dye, i immediately have to dress up myself for a choir music concert at Yean's U, which is UCSI. and the choir, is cool!
the only comment i can made is, human's voices can be such beautiful.
p/s: once in my life, at least i dye my hair RED-BROWN. =D
x-men first class
on Thursday, June 16, 2011
i can't believe that our math teacher was missing, he's somewhere around the earth but for sure he's not in the college and nobody able to call him. our A2 math are dead.
so, early in the morning, our 1st class cancelled. which means the whole day i went for only 1 class what the hell? but then, i went to watch x-men first class with Ka Seng and Priya.
interesting movie, a must-watch movie. the best part was after the movie, we all discuss about the movie, that's the fun part of all. x)
p/s: great day!
so, early in the morning, our 1st class cancelled. which means the whole day i went for only 1 class what the hell? but then, i went to watch x-men first class with Ka Seng and Priya.
interesting movie, a must-watch movie. the best part was after the movie, we all discuss about the movie, that's the fun part of all. x)
p/s: great day!
MUET
on Monday, June 13, 2011
MUET result came out at last, and most my my friends get a good result, great!
plan to take it for the next enrollment for MUET but i am not sure when is it, hope i can do it well.
and so, mood swinging like hell today. and luckily now i felt a lot better, thanks a lot for your advices which is so convince-able.
plan to take it for the next enrollment for MUET but i am not sure when is it, hope i can do it well.
and so, mood swinging like hell today. and luckily now i felt a lot better, thanks a lot for your advices which is so convince-able.
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| i think that's the best photo i ever take during the Ipoh trip x) Angel: Sai Kit |
ipoh trip 4th day
on Sunday, June 12, 2011
today is the last day, the day we leave Perak.
Gordon, Ah Gkee, Angel and Xiao Wen went for the hotel buffet, while the others still in sleeping mode lol. i am the last one to wake up i guess, i din't even notice my hp alarm rang until Cia Lev awake me haha, thanks!
when i bath, my back pain like hell, it's like burning pain urgh. when i look at the mirror, i get sunburn. not only me, all the boys' back get sunburn too haha! our back red like hell xD
so. before we going back to Yee Wen's house, we took another photo, again :D
we had lunch first before we go to the railway station. Perak tao fu fa smooth like hell, and the salted chicken's taste not bad too, thanks Yee Wen's mother susah payah prepared all the noodles for us <3
p/s: on train, everybody sleep, these four days is the most excited day for the whole month since exams started. thanks buddies.
Gordon, Ah Gkee, Angel and Xiao Wen went for the hotel buffet, while the others still in sleeping mode lol. i am the last one to wake up i guess, i din't even notice my hp alarm rang until Cia Lev awake me haha, thanks!
when i bath, my back pain like hell, it's like burning pain urgh. when i look at the mirror, i get sunburn. not only me, all the boys' back get sunburn too haha! our back red like hell xD
so. before we going back to Yee Wen's house, we took another photo, again :D
we had lunch first before we go to the railway station. Perak tao fu fa smooth like hell, and the salted chicken's taste not bad too, thanks Yee Wen's mother susah payah prepared all the noodles for us <3
p/s: on train, everybody sleep, these four days is the most excited day for the whole month since exams started. thanks buddies.
ipoh trip 3rd day
in our schedule, today we're going to take off to Bukit Merah, somewhere in Perak and i am not very sure also, i just follow the crowd x)
before we take off, we firstly took a photo haha!
yeah, let's go to our destination right now! and on the way:
after one hour, we reached Bukit Merah. we had a lot of activities, went to water park to play water, cycling, and few more activities, i forgot. Overall is very fun! xD
p/s: the third night was the most tiring night, i had a very good sleep :D
before we take off, we firstly took a photo haha!
yeah, let's go to our destination right now! and on the way:
after one hour, we reached Bukit Merah. we had a lot of activities, went to water park to play water, cycling, and few more activities, i forgot. Overall is very fun! xD
p/s: the third night was the most tiring night, i had a very good sleep :D
ipoh trip 2nd day
the first night was hard for me to sleep. maybe the surrounding and the environment isn't the same with KL was quite different made me hard to fall asleep. but then not only me had insomnia, Cia Lev and Ah Gkee accompany me too, 3 of us just slept for few hours lol
p/s: so that's our second day x)
so early in the morning, i set an alarm at around 7am i guess, we have to wake up and bath and brush and change a new set of clothes, everything, to begin our trip. thanks Yee Wen's mother for bringing us to all the MUST VISIT places, i, and i believe my classmates had fun too.
except visiting, we ate a lot too, i almost can't breath =.= *burg*
evening, we went to Tesco to buy some foods and drinks for the third day. and at the same time, we going to buy some ingredients for tonight BBQ party at Yee Wen's house, wohoo !!
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| wooo, great job Ah Gkee haha!!! |
p/s: so that's our second day x)
ipoh trip 1st day
thanks Siew Yean for fetching me to the LRT station on the day i off to Perak, thanks so much..
hmm, basically first day we din't visit to any place. when i reached Ipoh, Perak with my classmates, that was about 9pm, so we just had our dinner at a food court and celebrate that we had finally finished up our AS exam xD
and thanks for Yee Wen, and her family of course to let us stay in their house. 10 of us which is a huge number were not easy to settle up to live in their house haha! million thanks again.
p/s: the bed time story for the first day was so damn fun!
hmm, basically first day we din't visit to any place. when i reached Ipoh, Perak with my classmates, that was about 9pm, so we just had our dinner at a food court and celebrate that we had finally finished up our AS exam xD
and thanks for Yee Wen, and her family of course to let us stay in their house. 10 of us which is a huge number were not easy to settle up to live in their house haha! million thanks again.
p/s: the bed time story for the first day was so damn fun!
adventurous journey
on Wednesday, June 8, 2011
wow, i can't believe that all the AS students *exception for those who taking Physics* had finally ended the exam OFFICALLY lol..
so immediately after the exam, i went to mid valley with friends for carls junior lol.. the journey was adventurous i am not kidding, 3 of us understand it throughly, suffering and funny at the same time haha!
so immediately after the exam, i went to mid valley with friends for carls junior lol.. the journey was adventurous i am not kidding, 3 of us understand it throughly, suffering and funny at the same time haha!
p/s: carls junior's burger was so damn terribly BIG
入殓师
on Monday, June 6, 2011
今天想用华语。这几天心情像天气，时好时坏，难预测也难控制。
一大早起来就不见全家人，过后才知道它们全都去了医院看公公。他们回来说手术很成功，现在是休养期，得更加小心照顾。 老爸对我说：
“bryan 我有部电影想要介绍你看。”
“电影？什么电影？”
“一部日本片子。”
“名字？”
“《入殓师》。你一定要看，非得看不可！”
疑惑，对，是疑惑。怎么那么积极向我推荐这部片子？
到了晚上，我在看我的英文小说。老爸坐在电脑面前，按来按去不懂在忙什么。
“待会儿你的空记得看，”。留下这句话，他就上楼了。
我看着荧幕，“真的，额外的热情，”。放下手上的小说然后懒散地走了过去，看着《入殓师》三个字，“到底是什么戏？”，过后就开始了这部两个小时十分的电影。
完毕，只有两个字，震撼。入殓师给别人是个什么样的感觉，实在赎罪，还是上辈子做了些什么坏事，今世沦落到身为入殓师的窘境？我本人根本连入殓是什么意思都不懂，当然别说入殓师。
入殓师，为逝世的人重新打扮，擦干净身体，换上干净的衣服，化一个永恒的妆。这份工作本来就不受欢迎，而且还会被人歧视。可是，对他们来说，却是一份对人生开窍的转折点。
我老爸很喜欢日本的人情味，日本人的精神更是他学习的对象。别说以前的世界大战，已经是上辈子的恩怨，该过去的，和已经过去的就让它过去，更何况日本政府都很诚心地向全世界道歉。
老爸虽然没说过想出国，但我们都知道他想去日本亲身体验体验。在他有生之年，在我出身之时，就是我们踏出国的日子。
p/s: i love this movie a lot, it's meaningful and thanks papa <3
一大早起来就不见全家人，过后才知道它们全都去了医院看公公。他们回来说手术很成功，现在是休养期，得更加小心照顾。 老爸对我说：
“bryan 我有部电影想要介绍你看。”
“电影？什么电影？”
“一部日本片子。”
“名字？”
“《入殓师》。你一定要看，非得看不可！”
疑惑，对，是疑惑。怎么那么积极向我推荐这部片子？
到了晚上，我在看我的英文小说。老爸坐在电脑面前，按来按去不懂在忙什么。
“待会儿你的空记得看，”。留下这句话，他就上楼了。
我看着荧幕，“真的，额外的热情，”。放下手上的小说然后懒散地走了过去，看着《入殓师》三个字，“到底是什么戏？”，过后就开始了这部两个小时十分的电影。
完毕，只有两个字，震撼。入殓师给别人是个什么样的感觉，实在赎罪，还是上辈子做了些什么坏事，今世沦落到身为入殓师的窘境？我本人根本连入殓是什么意思都不懂，当然别说入殓师。
入殓师，为逝世的人重新打扮，擦干净身体，换上干净的衣服，化一个永恒的妆。这份工作本来就不受欢迎，而且还会被人歧视。可是，对他们来说，却是一份对人生开窍的转折点。
我老爸很喜欢日本的人情味，日本人的精神更是他学习的对象。别说以前的世界大战，已经是上辈子的恩怨，该过去的，和已经过去的就让它过去，更何况日本政府都很诚心地向全世界道歉。
老爸虽然没说过想出国，但我们都知道他想去日本亲身体验体验。在他有生之年，在我出身之时，就是我们踏出国的日子。
p/s: i love this movie a lot, it's meaningful and thanks papa <3
respect
on Sunday, June 5, 2011
i declare that the study mode was completely deactivated. i am dying.
besides, what happen today. im always thinking what actually happened the whole long day where some of the parts i can't really remember. *absent-minded*
oh yeah i remembered! i watch a video today shared by my friend, it's about what is morally wrong with homosexuality. the lecturer's name was John Corvino, a philosopher. his talk with no doubt, was awesome. i would called it AMAZING.
i would say, seriously humans never want to get boycott by the society as in YOU'RE A HOMOSEXUAL, YOU'RE KIND OF WEIRD CREATURE. but wait, why are you saying this again, is that because it's not natural? is that animals did not practice that so is the same to humans? but hello again, do animals give us any morality?
however, it's so hard to make people understand. as they're more convince-able there would be less discriminations toward them.
p/s: think, in a different perspective.
besides, what happen today. im always thinking what actually happened the whole long day where some of the parts i can't really remember. *absent-minded*
oh yeah i remembered! i watch a video today shared by my friend, it's about what is morally wrong with homosexuality. the lecturer's name was John Corvino, a philosopher. his talk with no doubt, was awesome. i would called it AMAZING.
i would say, seriously humans never want to get boycott by the society as in YOU'RE A HOMOSEXUAL, YOU'RE KIND OF WEIRD CREATURE. but wait, why are you saying this again, is that because it's not natural? is that animals did not practice that so is the same to humans? but hello again, do animals give us any morality?
however, it's so hard to make people understand. as they're more convince-able there would be less discriminations toward them.
p/s: think, in a different perspective.
learn the word 'contentment'
on Friday, June 3, 2011
chemistry paper 1 ended, i gave a melancholy sigh after the exam, i couldn't buy even 1 minute in the exam and it was terrible short, as in 1 hour for chemistry which require a deep thinking, urghh
anyway, im learning to let it go, ended so just, assume it as a trash! x)
and then, i finished the Deception Point and started another novel, by Dan Brown also, and this book is obviously familiar to everyone, THE DA VINCI CODE!! wow, i read the first few chapters and, SO HARD TO UNDERSTAND! all the bombastic words come in bunch lol, 2 weeks, i can finish it in 2 WEEKS!
last, i visited to facebook just now, as usual i play some games and look at my friends current status. AND, i saw her again with all the emo'ness and moodiness and sadness and disappointment and some other bull shit stuffs. i know i have no even a little power comment on people status but then, out of 24 hours, 23 hours in her day was only fill with all the bull shits as i stated above.
i am not to be rude to her but, all the bullshit she wrote made me wanna delete her from my friend list INSTANTLY, that make me so damn eyesore. *breathing* come on it's life, and... i don't know what to say anymore. stop complaining, understand the word contentment.
p/s: personal opinions.
anyway, im learning to let it go, ended so just, assume it as a trash! x)
and then, i finished the Deception Point and started another novel, by Dan Brown also, and this book is obviously familiar to everyone, THE DA VINCI CODE!! wow, i read the first few chapters and, SO HARD TO UNDERSTAND! all the bombastic words come in bunch lol, 2 weeks, i can finish it in 2 WEEKS!
last, i visited to facebook just now, as usual i play some games and look at my friends current status. AND, i saw her again with all the emo'ness and moodiness and sadness and disappointment and some other bull shit stuffs. i know i have no even a little power comment on people status but then, out of 24 hours, 23 hours in her day was only fill with all the bull shits as i stated above.
i am not to be rude to her but, all the bullshit she wrote made me wanna delete her from my friend list INSTANTLY, that make me so damn eyesore. *breathing* come on it's life, and... i don't know what to say anymore. stop complaining, understand the word contentment.
p/s: personal opinions.
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