Adventist Hospital won't hire me until i received my results from my university. So, basically, i'm done with university and currently waiting for the results. I have been working here and there while waiting for it; attending training that have nothing to do with what i'm going to do in the future, working something that has no relation at all. But one good thing out of it is... i'm finally off the debt! I have fully returned the money to my friend! She loaned me while i had an emergency and thank to her, everything was good again. While waiting and waiting i got a little impatient. I started to feel so upset that whatever i'm doing is such a waste of time, and worrying that whatever that had been promised during the interview may get turned down because honestly, it has been 2 months ago. If the hospital has hired me without the cert first, i would have been working there for 2 months already. I'm worried and my mind runs wild. So put myself into work and games. I play while i'm free so i won't overthink on something that i have no control over. Once a worrier, forever a worrier. Anyway, i feel so much better that way. Then, a week ago i attended a reunion. My friend asked how am i doing. I told her everything and she said "If i were you, i want to study for a bit first. Getting into the society too early makes me feel boring too soon... and i'm way to young to feel that way." Thinking about what she said, she may be right. I want everything to go fast. Run fast. Work fast. Everything fast. I worry about my future, i want to work towards my goal, to have a stable financial status, to fall in love, to create a family etc. An ordinary dream actually, and i'm afraid i won't be able to do it. I have plans but i'm stuck here. Now, i probably can take this opportunity to appreciate my surrounding in a slower pace.
Because i'm desperate, i fell badly and took a long time to recover. Remember that i was fooled that time, and i was so upset. But then, now, no more. I feeling really good. Thanks to him i'm afraid of attachment. I can't do it anymore. And i don't want to feel sad over people that have never felt that way for me. I'm too tired of that. It took me a long time to get back the peace of my mind. So long. And i'm so comfortable now. Until, i'm ready to get hurt again, i shall stay in this comfortable bubble of mine. Afraid, and tired.
And Elaine went to London 2 weeks ago. I planned to visit her next year when i'm financially stable. And my convo is in this coming November. And i have made a few good friends both in real life and the virtual world, and i'm getting even closer to my best friend Yean, and many more. So many things happened and so little time to update. I can't remember all of them but so far so good. And i hope things keep going that way. AND, I MAY BE ABLE TO GET MY RESULTS BY NEXT WEEK! NEXT MONDAY! JUST KEEP MY FINGER CROSSED AND GUYS, PLEASE PRAY FOR ME AND MAY GOD BLESS!
